The following is an excerpt from our book True Intimacy.
For the next month we will be posting a chapter a day for your reading (and marital) pleasure. However, if you would like to purchase an electronic or printed copy for yourself or someone else we would greatly appreciate your support! To go to the web page for more information click here.
These [trials] have come so that your faith – of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire – may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed. 1 Peter 1:7
Honestly in writing this book, all it’s done is make me ask more and more questions about God and sex. And I’ve got to say, since the first fast, Christian and I have… well… I’ll just say it’s been amazing, fun, adventurous, eye-opening, and just plain WOW!!!
In the beginning, we had agreed on 30 days; then on day 30 (after my purity bath) God told me to keep my mouth shut, my paws to myself, and let him lead. I couldn’t touch him in any way sexually without him first touching me. It was basically a really adult version of follow the leader. We took things VERY slowly; we were starting over from the very beginning. We had gone too fast in the beginning of our relationship and ended up swimming in a pond, this time we were going to take our time and get to the ocean! God was leading Christian, and Christian was leading me. Every time he stopped things, it screamed, “I love you and I respect you THIS much!” It was an amazing feeling, plus, talk about building up the sexual tension! Woo!
“Truth-day” came around and we stayed up until about 12:30 talking things out. I asked questions, I needed all the details, and he answered them. He said, “I’m sorry” and I said, “I forgive you”. When our hearts are changed, everything changes; and from the moment I forgave him I had such an overwhelming desire for him. We didn’t know what to do. Was it still too soon to have sex? What was God’s will for us? So we asked God for a sign. We, “laid out the wool”15, and He gave me a definite sign that pointed to a big fat “YES HAVE SEX”! When I told Christian that God had said “Yes” and that I was still supposed to follow him, he took the lead, and although it was already almost 1 o’ clock in the morning, we took our time. Stopping frequently to ask if it was REALLY God’s will for us to be doing what we were doing; just to make sure we were not going too quickly. We’d already done that once and it almost cost us our marriage, we were NOT going to do that again!
Suddenly, I remembered my purity bath. I had purified myself with water, oil and perfume; yet Christian had done none of this yet. That’s when God told me to “Anoint his head with oil”. I poured some oil into my left palm and then put a dab of oil on my husband’s ear, hand and foot.16 “To put the oil on these three body parts is a reminder to us that we should constantly guard every part of our lives. We must submit to God’s will in what we listen to and how eagerly we devote ourselves to his word (ear). We must guard our actions and choices (hand), and we must carefully watch our walk though life (foot).”17 We prayed together asking God to bless our union for His glory and to purify Christian, cleanse his sins, and make him whole in Christ again.
Well, after that, although we were still taking our time we got down to business; and OH MY! I am not kidding when I say, by FAR the BEST SEX OF OUR LIVES!!! Never before had we felt so connected, so safe, so blessed by each other’s company, so amazingly stimulated, so intimate than in that moment in each other’s arms. In that moment we both changed. We changed from the world’s view of how sex is supposed to be, to how God MEANT for sex to be. Between a truly intimate married couple.
THANK YOU GOD FOR MY HUSBAND!!!
Are you ready for the best sex of your life? You better be, because you’re going to get it soon. With all of the secrets, lies, and other “stuff” out-of-the-way, there will be nothing between you; nothing worrying you in the back of your mind. No questions you are burning to ask, or answer. When all of that is gone, God can fully bless you with great sex.
We took our time that night. Yes, it built up great sexual tension and made us crazy for each other, but we wanted to make sure that we were following God this time. We would proceed a little way, then stop and ask Him if it was His will for us to go on. Our sign to go on was the rain on the roof of the house.
To explain this a little bit, I need to go back to the purity bath. That night Tamar gave me my first purity bath with the oil, but you can’t bathe without water. Tamar asked God “What about the water?” In that instant, it started raining – hard – and that was her answer. Every time I asked if I should go on, the rain would get harder and we could hear it on the roof. We went on that night, knowing we were doing things correctly according to Him.