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So Jacob said to his household and to all who were with him, “Put away the foreign gods which are among you, and purify yourselves and change your garments.” Genesis 35:2
Christian and I were drawing near to the end of our 30 days, and I just had this feeling in my gut that we weren’t going to just “jump right back in the sack” on day 30. The morning of day 30 actually came and I still felt like it wasn’t time yet; like I needed to DO something first. All morning long I had the word “purify” running through my head. I had just spent an entire month learning who I was, how God saw me, and how to be the best wife I could possibly be; and I felt like I needed to do something…ritualistic. So I looked up scriptures for purification rituals. In almost every one of them they mentioned blood, water, oil and perfume. Well, Christ took care of all the blood we would ever need, so I wasn’t concerned at all with that. But the water, oil and perfume made sense to me; I could take a bath. I remembered how in 2 Samuel chapter 11 when David saw Bathsheba from his rooftop she was taking a bath and had purified herself from her uncleaness. So. Blood: provided by Christ, check. Water: take a bath, check. Oil and perfume: I had a bottle of olive oil and some vanilla in the kitchen, check!
So, here’s my general procedure for the purity bath that I take, the Holy Spirit usually leads me to change things here and there from time to time, add a few things, subtract a few, etc. Pray about it and if God is leading you to change something, feel free to do so. Our experiences with God are uniquely ours, so your purity bath may look completely different from mine. This is just what I have done.
When my period is completely finished, 7 days from when it started, I take a purity bath to dedicate myself to God. It is to help me feel pure, inside and outside. Because through the blood of Christ we have been made pure and don’t HAVE to do any purification rituals anymore, but I feel like sometimes as humans we need to DO something to help us remember that fact. Plus, I have learned that God really loves symbolism, so I know that this process pleases Him greatly. (Note: This entire process generally takes an hour or more depending on how long I sit, soak and pray. So I usually try to carve out plenty of time in my schedule for it. I really don’t like skimping on this very intimate time with my LORD.)
Step 1) I have an old soy sauce bottle that I use to mix my anointing oil; it’s just the right size and pours nicely. I never actually measure anything, but I use a cup of oil and a bit of pure vanilla extract (not a whole lot maybe a teaspoon, a little bit of this stuff goes a LOOOONG way) into the bottle. These are the ingredients that God has inspired me to use, however, this bath is intimately yours and God’s so I highly recommend asking Him what He would like for you to use for your oil and perfume.
Step 2) I clean my bathroom concentrating on the tub itself, even if I just did it the other day, I do it again. (Do NOT skip scrubbing the tub! I did this ONCE and I will NEVER do it again. The rest of the bathroom is less important, but you can not take a sacred bath in a dirty tub! Learn from my mistake, do NOT skip this part of cleaning.) Cleaning is a symbolic act, one where I am cleaning the dirt and grime from my bathroom and asking God to continue cleaning the dirt and grime of sin from my heart. It is time spent on my knees in fervent prayer. I thank God for forgiving me and for cleaning up my life and my marriage. God has changed ME so much already and He isn’t done with me yet. Praise God!
Step 3) Once everything is clean and all the dirt and trash are outside the room, I start filling the tub with the HOTTEST water I can possibly stand; as full as it can go without running over when I get in. To me, this is like God’s cleansing fire and the Holy Spirit. Sometimes, if the room is cool enough you can actually see the steam rising off the hot water just like the Holy Spirit moving throughout the room, filling your lungs. It’s incredible!
Step 4) I kneel before my full tub and come before God on this sacred day, naked, unashamed, grateful for the work He is doing in my life, and sincerely apologetic for the things that I have done against Him. I shake the bottle and mix the oil and vanilla together asking God to make Christian and I one flesh (the two shall become one flesh). Then I pour it into the water and ask God to be the third cord that binds our hearts together forever. I ask God to use this water to make me a virgin again, and to give us back all the missing pieces of our hearts. I beg for His forgiveness.
Step 5) Read Romans 6:11-14.
Step 6) I completely submerge each part of my body in the water as I dedicate it to God for His glory and ask Him to purify and cleanse me. I start with my feet and finish with my ears, eyes, nose, mouth and mind including swallowing a bit of the water and praying that He fill me with His words and that my words be pleasing to Him. No more shall sin rule over me! I lay there and think about the changes that God has made in me over the last days and how He loves me. I continue to pray (and listen) as I rest in the presence of the LORD, letting him surround me and fill me with His Holy Spirit.
Step 7) Once I’ve soaked long enough, I lay down as far into the tub as I can and pull the plug on the drain with my foot. As the water drains away from me I pray that my sins will be in the water and that as they drain away from me God will throw them as far as the East is from the West! It’s the coolest feeling as the water drains; it feels like the sins are being sucked out of your body! It only feels like this when you’re laying in the water though.
Step 8 ) (CAUTION: the tub will be soaked in oil and will be SLIPPERY at first so be VERY CAREFUL!) I carefully stand up and take a shower, totally pampering myself. I shave, wash my hair, and take my time; doing all those things that I normally never take the time to do. I groom things, buff things, scrub things, anything to make me feel gorgeous.
Step 9) I clothe myself in clean white garments of righteousness. (This is where the white panties/bra or jammies come in; I hope you were able to get some new ones.) Now, while this doesn’t mean that I’m perfect; it does mean that I’m trying to be.
From this point forward, I am like the lions from Daniel in the lion’s den. I keep my mouth shut and my paws to myself. I have my husband show me how much I mean to him by not rushing things. We’re talking days here, not hour’s people. We’ll talk a little more about this later.
Husbands, you don’t have to do your purity bath like Tamar listed hers, but rather let God lead you. I don’t take baths, but shower instead. And I don’t shave my legs. You don’t have to shave your legs either… unless that’s something you do. I know a couple of guys that do, but it’s your prerogative.
Tamar blessed me by anointing my head with oil the first time after our first fast. After that I started taking my own purity baths. I prepare myself like it is my wedding day. I clean the shower. I run really hot water for my shower, use some nice smelling body wash and scrub myself. I use oil to shave my head and face, so I ask God to bless the oil so that I may purify myself for my wife.
I wore the typical black tux at our wedding, so I bought some black, silky boxers to wear. You don’t have to do this, but if your wife got dressed up in a new night-gown, or new white underwear, you should do something nice too.