Song of Songs

He was There

Song of Solomon 5:10-8:14

“This is my beloved, and this is my friend.” Song of Solomon 5:16

It’s funny, when I picked out this verse I had forgotten how familiar it was. It wasn’t until I wrote it down that I realized that it’s the verse that many Christian couples choose to put on the front of their wedding program. It’s funny, all those times I read those programs and I didn’t even realize that it was scripture I was reading, I just liked the idea of someone not just being your lover but your friend as well. Now I understand why. J

To think back on that day, the day when we joined as husband and wife, it seems like a distant dream. Like it happened, but yet, if we didn’t have the pictures and the video I would think that perhaps it had all been a dream. It’s only been fourteen years this June, but still, it’s been awhile! It was a really awesome day, it was the day I married my best friend.

I didn’t realize it at the time, but I was. He was just my friend at that point. Then he became my husband, my partner and my provider. I didn’t realize then what I know now. He would become my BEST friend. I’ve spent over half my life with this man by my side. He is the one person in the whole world who has been with me through more than anyone else, even my parents. He knows more about me than anyone.


Two weeks after our honeymoon when I slashed my thumb with a brand spankin’ new table knife while trying to pry open a frozen bagel, he was right there with a bandage and support… and advice about stitches. When I lay on a hospital bed, nine months pregnant having a seizure, he was there with the nurses. While I spent the rest of the day in a dark room with pitocin IVs hanging from my arms he sat in a chair by the window trying to read baby name books by the light through the crack in the curtain. I don’t remember him really moving from that post until he had to get ready for the surgery. When money got tight after the baby was born he went back to school to learn a new trade so that he could take better care of us. When I went on bed rest at 34 weeks with baby number two, he was there with McDonald’s M&M McFlurries, a spoon and a blood pressure cuff. When we moved two weeks before the baby was born he was the one who carried all the boxes and put things away. When that baby had to have surgery at age two because she was basically deaf, he was right there in the waiting room with me making me laugh the fear away. Even now as I’m watching her struggle in school, lagging behind her peers by almost exactly the same amount of time that she couldn’t hear, he’s right by my side coming up with just the right answers to each situation. He’s there in the morning when I need help deciding which shirt to wear to work and what groceries to pick up at the store. He’s there because on that day when we got married that’s what he promised to do. He promised to be there for me for better or for worse, in sickness and in health, till death do us part. And he has been every step of the way. That’s a friend. That’s a husband. That’s a partner. He’s so much more than a Beloved, he’s a friend.

“No longer do I call you servants, for the servant does not know what his master is doing, but I have called you friends, for all that I have heard from My Father I have made known to you.” John 15:15

“And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age.” Matthew 28:20


Categories: 365 Life, Jesus Loves YOU, Song of Songs | Leave a comment

Beautiful Mess

Song of Solomon 1:1-5:9

“Behold, you are beautiful, my Beloved, truly delightful.” Song of Solomon 1:16

OK, so I was supposed to be writing my review of Chapter 4 of Beth Moore’s So Long, Insecurity You’ve Been a Bad Friend to Us on Saturday… but I forgot. I was inspired after watching Mom’s Night Out to write a Mother’s Day post, so sue me. 😉 (Seriously, Go watch that movie!!!!!) So I’m writing my review of Chapter 4 “Good Company” today instead.

I have to admit, I was a little overwhelmed when I first picked up my Bible and read the first half of Song of Solomon. Not that I haven’t read it before, I actually spent a decent amount of time in that book while writing True Intimacy with my husband. But it’s been a LOOOONG time since I’ve cracked open those pages and I’d forgotten how… steamy they were. Wooo! Those pages are not for the faint of heart are they friends? And then I picked up Beth Moore’s book and SHE was talking about sex too! Freaky!

Chapter 4: Good Company is all about the people in the Bible that show insecurity through their words and actions: Eve and her choice of fig leaves, Sarah and her choice of allowing Abraham to take her handmaiden as a wife, Leah and Rachel in their baby battle over Jacob’s heart, Moses and his insecurity over the role God chose for him to play in the salvation of His people, Saul and his insecurity over the role God chose for him to play in the ruling of His people, Paul and his insecurity in his status as an apostle (no doubt because of his previous role in the persecution of the other apostles). The list went on and on.

If at the end of Chapter 3 I was chattering my teeth in fear of the insecurities I was sure I had; by the end of Chapter 4 I was raising my sword and shouting a battle cry over them. I am not alone in the camp of insecurity! And what’s even more amazing to me is the role that insecurity has played throughout the lives of many of the founders of our faith.

Our spiritual ancestors have struggled with this very same enemy. Some didn’t fare so well, but others, like Paul, conquered this enemy with ruthless abandon. On page 54 Beth says that, “Insecurity lives in constant terror of loss. Insecure people are always afraid that something or somebody is going to be taken from them.” Paul was a BIG name in the synagogues of his time. He persecuted the early Christ followers with such ferocity that his name was almost synonymous with death. If you knew Paul was after you, you cringed in fear. Period. He was ruthless.

But then one day Jesus appeared to him on the road to Damascus and literally knocked him off his high horse. Jesus asked him why he was persecuting Jesus. And it was in that moment that Paul saw the error of his ways. He immediately turned from the persecution of the Church and became a member of the Church. He became an apostle and began going through the countryside preaching the name of Jesus. People were stunned by the change in his attitude toward Christ. Here’s this guy who had been out to kill anyone who taught in Jesus’ name, now he’s out teaching in Jesus’ name! Paul brought many many many people to salvation through Christ. But his past followed him.

While he had seen the error of his ways and had changed, people were very wary of him. Understandably so! But his past mistakes certainly played a part in his future security among the apostles. If you look at 2 Corinthians 11:5 he calls them “super-apostles” and affirms that he is in no way inferior to them. His mere defense of his position points us in the direction of assuming that he himself is fearful of his inferiority to them!

In the same way, our past can certainly play a HUGE role in our present insecurities. But it doesn’t have to! Our past can cry out to us from behind and beg for our attention. It can claim to us that we have shortcomings because of it, but WE have the choice to decide whether we’re going to listen to our past or not. It’s like Beth says on page 57, “The beauty of Paul wasn’t his superhumanity but his unwillingness to let his weaknesses, feelings and fears over ride his faith. Like us, the fiercest enemy he had to fight in the fulfillment of his destiny was himself.”

We each have a destiny to fulfill. God has created you for a PURPOSE, you have a calling. Moses was called to be God’s tongue, in SPITE of his “slowness of speech”. God CHOSE Moses. Moses was God’s first choice for the job. God believed in Moses’ ability to do what God called him to do because that’s what God had CREATED him to do. It was Moses who didn’t believe in himself. (See Exodus 3:1-4:17)

God CHOSE Saul. Saul was God’s first choice to be the first king of Israel. But when Saul’s coronation day came he was nowhere to be found! When they consulted the LORD as to his whereabouts they discovered that he was hiding in the baggage! Saul didn’t believe in himself and his own ability to be king. His own insecurity of his ability to be king was amplified even more when David came around and started winning battles and inspiring women to sing songs. Saul’s insecurity became such a problem for him that he literally lost his mind over it. Saul allowed his insecurity to incapacitate his ability to do what God had called him to do.

One of my favorite quotes from Paul is 1 Corinthians 15:10 “by the grace of God I am what I am. And His grace towards me is not in vain.” Paul never forgot what he had done to his fellow man. But he never let it stop him from achieving everything that God had called him to do either. God’s grace, His LOVE, covers over a multitude of sins. We make mistakes. It’s part of being human! But just because we’ve made mistakes doesn’t mean that we should give up the farm! God has called you to something that He made you for. He CHOSE you for a special task that you would be the only person fully suited to accomplish it. Sure, someone else can do it, but should they? We can’t let our shortcomings stop us from believing in ourselves enough to push forward and accomplish the goal that God has set for us to accomplish. I think Beth says it beautifully on page 57 when she says, “Human flesh and blood have no weakness so strong that God’s strength is made weak.”

Hallelujah sister, YES!

I’m sorry folks, but there is nothing in me that is strong enough to undo what Jesus has done for me! There is no weakness in me, no insecurity so strong that can overpower the power of Christ through me! Jesus paid it ALL. And while flesh and bone may fail, Jesus doesn’t.

My friend, you may be a mess, but you are a BEAUTIFUL mess with a beautiful message! You may be going through a massive test, but you will have a massive testimony! YOU are the Beloved of God Almighty, maker of Heaven and Earth and nothing in all of creation can separate you from the Grace that is in Christ Jesus. And it is by the Grace of God that you are what you are! You are CALLED, checkered past and all. You are CHOSEN, messy weaknesses and all. You are LOVED with a ferocity that is beyond any and all human comprehension. You are BEAUTIFUL to Him who called you. You need only to BELIEVE IT FOR YOURSELF! Be unwilling to let your weaknesses, feelings and fears over ride your faith. Be unwilling to let the worst of you get the best of you! God created you to be more than a conqueror! So go out there and conquer!

Categories: 365 Life, Insecurity, Jesus Loves YOU, Song of Songs | Leave a comment

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