Season 3

2 Chronicles 10:1-15:19

“O Lord, no one but You can help the powerless against the mighty! Help us, O LORD our God. For we trust in You alone. It is in Your name alone that we have come against this vast horde.” 2 Chronicles 14:11

At Easter our Pastor Steve preached on the single moment in all of History that defines Christianity: The Resurrection of Christ. Everything that Jesus had said up to that point; all of His wise words and teaching, all of the word pictures of the kingdom of heaven, all of it would have meant nothing if He hadn’t raised Himself back up from the dead. Jesus had claimed to be the Son of God, the Messiah, and when He came back to life after being dead for three days, He proved it. And while the Resurrection is the pinnacle sign/wonder of Jesus’ ministry, it’s not the only sign and wonder that proved to the people (and to us) that He was (and still is) the Messiah. (Acts 2:22) The writer of Hebrews further confirms this to us in chapter two verses three and four saying: “So what makes us think we can escape if we ignore this great salvation that was first announced by the Lord Jesus Himself and then delivered to us by those who heard Him speak? And God confirmed His message by giving signs and wonders and various miracles and gifts of the Holy Spirit whenever He chose.”

In Acts chapter one, after the resurrection and immediately before the ascension, Jesus tells the Disciples,

“Do not leave Jerusalem until the Father sends you the gift He promised, as I told you before. John baptized with water, but in just a few days you will be baptized with the Holy Spirit. You will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes upon you. And you will be My witnesses, telling people about Me everywhere – in Jerusalem, throughout Judea, in Samaria, and to the ends of the earth.” (verses 4-5&8)

A few days later they’re all just sitting around when the room starts filling with the sound of rushing wind and tongues of fire hover over their heads and they begin to speak in other languages because they’ve been filled with the Holy Spirit who has given them that power.

Acts 14:3 says that “the apostles stayed [in Iconium] a long time, preaching boldly about the grace of the Lord. And the Lord proved their message was true by giving them power to do miraculous signs and wonders.” God is teaching me something important today and I pray that none of us misses it. There is a correlation between the message of the gospel and signs and wonders. They go together like peanut butter and jelly. Sure they can be eaten alone, but BOY they are both so much better together!

I’m wondering, if perhaps, the message of the Church is falling on deaf ears because it’s not being accompanied by signs and wonders. The liberal atheistic groups are ranting and raving because all they see is a group of powerless Bible thumpers screaming at them to repent. What if, instead of screaming at them we started healing them – proving that our message of Jesus’ Grace is true? That Jesus DOES save. That Jesus DOES heal. That Jesus DOES love them in spite of their sin. THAT could change the world.

With the indwelling power of the Holy Spirit ANY believer can speak and heal the sick. Watch these! They’re a little lengthy but worth EVERY LIFE CHANGING SECOND! The reactions of the people are priceless!

[Healing on the Streets]

[Street Healing with Tom Fischer there is some language in this one, but it’s as a reaction to their miraculous healing.]

In Luke 10:17-20 the Disciples came to Jesus and said,

“Lord, even the demons obey us when we use Your name!”

“Yes” He told them, “I saw Satan fall like lightning! Look, I have given you authority over all the power of the enemy and you can walk among snakes and scorpions and crush them. Nothing will injure you. But don’t rejoice because evil spirits obey you; rejoice because your names are registered in heaven.”

In Acts chapter four Peter and John get called before the council for healing a man in Jesus’ name. And after the council lets them go, Peter and John meet with the other believers in the area to tell them what has just happened. When the believers heard their story they lifted their voices in prayer:

“O Sovereign Lord, Creator of heaven and earth, the sea, and everything in them – You spoke long ago by the Holy Spirit through our ancestor David, Your servant, saying,

‘Why were the nations so angry?

Why did they waste their time with futile plans?

The king of earth prepared for battle; the rulers gathered together against the LORD and against the Messiah.’

In fact, this has happened here in this very city! For Herod Antipas, Pontius Pilate the governor, the Gentiles, and the people of Israel were all united against Jesus, Your holy servant, whom You anointed. But everything they did was determined before-hand according to Your will. And now, O Lord, hear their threats, and give us, your servants great boldness in preaching Your Word. Stretch out Your hand with healing power; may miraculous signs and wonders be done through the name of Your holy servant Jesus.”

After this prayer, the meeting room shook, and they were all filled with the Holy Spirit’s power to preach the Word of God with boldness! I wonder, what kind of miracle-working power has God wanted to bestow in YOU if only you would pray today for the boldness to speak in Jesus’ name and command evil to leave?

2 Chronicles 6:1-9:31

“I will always watch over it, for it is dear to My heart.” 2 Chronicles 7:16

Oh where to start! There are SO many things I want to talk to you about today! I think I’ll start with my awesome praise, I’m writing this from my computer!!! 😀 It feels sooooo good to have these sweet little keys tapping away under my fingers today! I missed them so much! Going without something for a few days certainly makes you realize just how much it means to you!!! My phone is a suitable substitute but it certainly isn’t my computer!

Today I continued reading Chapter 6 A Cocktail of Ego and Culture in So Long, Insecurity You’ve Been a Bad Friend to Us. The part of the chapter that I read focused on Pride. Talk about a topic hitting home! Yowzers! If only you could see my copy of the book, there are more words highlighted than not! Almost every sentence she wrote totally hit home. But the section that shook me up the most was this:

“Pride is a slave driver like no other, and if it can’t drive us to destruction, it will drive us to distraction. Think about the madness this one little trait can cause:

If we can’t be the most attractive, at least we can be the best at something.

And if we can’t be the best at something, we can at least be the hardest working.

And if we can’t be the hardest working, we can at least be the most congenial.

And if we can’t be the most congenial, we can at least be the most noticeable.

And if we can’t be the most noticeable, we can at least be the most religious.

And if we can’t be the most religious, we can at least be the most exhausted.

And it never ends, because big egos insist on our being a “the.” Not just an “a.” We’re that desperate for significance. We live our lives screaming, ‘Somebody notice me!’ And do you want to hear something interesting? That’s exactly how God made us.

That very need is built into our human hard drive to send us on a search for our Creator, who can assign us more significance than we can handle. He not only notices us, He never takes His eyes off us.”*

I don’t know about you, but I find that profound. The very thing that plagues me and often times creates my insecurity is connected to something that God put into me. To the very core of my being, almost every single one of my thoughts and actions can be tied to my desperate desire for someone to notice me. Whether it’s my husband, my friends, my parents, my kids, that stranger, even you. I want to be noticed. But often times I find myself desiring something that I can’t always put my finger on, I want GOD’S attention. I want to know that HE notices me. I am so small and insignificant in the scope of the universe. I’m so small that I get lost in a group of elementary students! (And sadly that’s NOT an exaggeration, I really do.) So if I’m going about my day and my boss doesn’t notice me, and my family doesn’t notice me, how on earth am I supposed to feel like GOD notices me? I mean He’s got millions and millions of people to take care of, not to mention, the small matter of keeping the planets all spinning in the right directions. So who am I that the God of the Universe would notice me and my problems and my dreams and my desire to be noticed? And of course Pride is right there to make sure that I feel even smaller and less significant that I really am. He loves to point out all the instances where prayers weren’t answered in the exact way that I wanted them to be answered. Or to put into false perspective a situation where someone had wronged me, when in fact I was the one in the wrong.

We want to feel special and needed and loved. We all want to be noticed for something. And if it’s not something good then at least it can be something negative, just as long as we’re being noticed for something.

It seems to me that the best response to Pride in times like these is to use the Sword of the Spirit, the Word of God. In today’s Word of the Day Solomon built the temple for the LORD and is dedicating it to Him when God responds to Solomon about the temple. He says, “My eyes will be open and My ears attentive to every prayer made in this place. For I have chosen this Temple and set it apart to be holy – a place where My name will be honored forever. I will always watch over it, for it is dear to My heart.” (2 Chronicles 7:15-16)

Now I’m going to set something up for you so bear with me here for a minute as I backtrack in order to set the scene for you.

In Exodus Moses made a tent of meeting they called the Tabernacle. It was a place where people could go to pray and to make sacrifices to the LORD. On the day when they dedicated it, “the cloud covered the Tabernacle, and the glory of the LORD filled the Tabernacle. Moses could no longer enter the Tabernacle because the cloud had settled down over it, and the glory of the LORD filled the Tabernacle.” (40:34-35) The Spirit of the LORD came and filled that place and He made the place His people dedicated to Him, His home.

Years later after the Israelites had completely conquered the Promised Land and taken control of it they left behind their season of wandering and living in tents and began a season of settling and living in more permanent homes. In 2 Chronicles Solomon made a building they called the Temple. It too was a place where people could go to pray and to make sacrifices to the LORD. And on the day when they dedicated it, “fire flashed down from heaven and burned up the burnt offerings and sacrifices, and the glorious presence of the LORD filled the Temple. The priests could not enter the Temple of the LORD because the glorious presence of the LORD filled it.” (7:1-2) The Spirit of the LORD came and filled that place and He made the place His people dedicated to Him, His home.

Many years later Jesus came and sacrificed Himself on a cross to pay for our sins against God. Then He rose from the dead and called His followers to leave behind their season of wandering away from God and begin a season of settling and living in a more permanent relationship with Him. In Acts chapter 2 He provided the means to such a relationship: “On the day of Pentecost all the believers were meeting together in one place. Suddenly, there was a sound from heaven like the roaring of a mighty wind storm, and it filled the house where they were sitting. Then, what looked like flames or tongues of fire appeared and settled on each of them. And everyone present was filled with the Holy Spirit and began speaking in other languages, as the Holy Spirit gave them this ability.” (1-4) The Spirit of the LORD came and filled that place and He made the place – His people dedicated to Him, His home.

And what’s more, just like the wilderness Tabernacle and the Promised Land Temple, His Spirit filled them to the point where no one could enter. When you take a look at the original text of each of these three passages, that word “filled” means to be filled to the point of *almost* overflowing.

The Greek describes it as the kind of filling where if one single drop more were added, the cup would overflow. It’s the kind of full that there is NO ROOM for anything else except for what is filling the cup. And when you’re talking about the Spirit of God coming and filling something, He doesn’t leave any gaps. He’s not like a cup full of rocks, where when it’s full of rocks there’s still room for gravel and sand. The eternally loving Spirit of God is Living Water, it comes in and fills ALL the gaps and ALL the cracks and ALL the empty places so that there is NO ROOM LEFT for Pride or Fear or Doubt or Insecurity. Only Love remains.

Dedicate yourself to God. Allow His Spirit, His loving presence, to come and fill in all your empty places so that there is no room left for Pride. Remember what God said about the temple dedicated to Him?

“My eyes will be open and My ears attentive to every prayer made in this place. For I have chosen this Temple and set it apart to be holy – a place where My name will be honored forever. I will always watch over it, for it is dear to My heart.” (2 Chronicles 7:15-16) My friend, YOU ARE THAT TEMPLE! Jesus notices YOU for YOU are dear to His heart.

* Moore, Beth. P 102. So Long, Insecurity You’ve Been a Bad Friend to Us. 2010. Tyndale House Publishers.

1 Chronicles 16:1-19:19

“Do not touch My chosen people, and do not hurt My prophets.” 1 Chronicles 16:22

Have you ever felt left behind, hurt or forgotten? Have you ever felt betrayed, lost or lonely? How about forsaken, beaten down or rejected? My friend, Jesus knows how you feel and He’s here to help you through it all. We are Satan’s favorite pin cushion; when it comes to torture we’re his favorite outlet. But that doesn’t mean that we have to continue just sitting there and taking it! God Himself has spoken over us, “Do not touch My chosen people” this includes YOU. All too often we allow ourselves to be beaten and abused by the Enemy, usually because we feel like we deserve what he’s dishing out. But we don’t!

OK, I take that back, we did deserve it; but Jesus took that punishment for us. And since Double Jeopardy isn’t allowed in God’s courtroom either, Satan isn’t allowed to punish us for crimes where the punishment has already been carried out – on Jesus. You see God made Jesus (who knew no sin) to be sin for us, so that in Him we might become the righteousness of God. (2 Corinthians 5:21) According to Romans 5:19 we have been MADE righteous. It’s not something we’ve done; it’s something that has been done FOR us. Adam’s sin MADE us sinners, Jesus’ sacrifice on the cross MADE us righteous. Period. There is no debating or arguing about it, not with each other and certainly not with Satan. He knows that we’ve been made righteous (or put into right standing with God), but if he can make us BELIEVE that we’re still sinners then he can hold all kinds of torturous power over us.

We’ve GOT to stop believing the LIES that Satan feeds us.

Satan would love to have us believe that the blood isn’t as powerful and effective as it really is. He would love for us to think that it only works for x-amount of things, when in reality it works for EVERYTHING! Satan would love to have us believe that the blood of Jesus is exactly like the blood of those goats and bulls that atoned for one sin at a time. But Jesus wasn’t a sacrifice like those animals, He was SO MUCH BETTER! I mean, sure when I say it your brain says, “Well duh, of course His sacrifice was so much better than those animal sacrifices”. But think back to the way you’ve been behaving lately (God is totally pointing His finger at ME right now on this one), have you been ACTING like the blood of Jesus is on you? Or have you been believing and behaving as though a mere goat’s blood is sprinkled over the doorposts of your heart?

I don’t know about you my friends, but I am GUILTY AS CHARGED! I’ve been feeling, and acting, defeated and ugly and just down right sorry for myself on a lot of things. But I have no need to be! I am the daughter of the KING of kings and the LORD of lords! I have been betrothed to the Son of God and I have been adopted into the family of the Creator of the Universe, what on earth do I have to be feeling defeated about???

In today’s Word of the Day there’s a phrase that is repeated twice, I’m sure for emphasis, that I think we need to adopt as our own today: “So the Lord made David victorious wherever he went.” The favor of God was upon David then just like it’s upon us today. And it is upon us because Jesus is in us through faith in Him. Now, are you ready to have your mind blown? Get this, Jesus was in David just as He is in us today. Bear with me here, this is cool. In Hebrews 7 it says that Melchizedek blessed Levi when he blessed Abraham because Levi was in Abraham’s loins at that time. God blessed David while Jesus was still in his loins. What’s more, what if God chose Abraham and set him apart because God knew that Jesus was in Abraham! God CHOSE you because Jesus is in you.

There is something that God has chosen you for that you are the one and only person on this planet that can do it the way God wants it done. Sure there may be hundreds if not thousands of other people out there that are fully capable of doing what you’ve been called to do. BUT none of them are able to do it the way YOU will do it. You are unique. There is no one with your exact past. There is no one with your exact talents. There is no one with your exact personality. There is no one exactly like you, and it is for that very reason that God chose you to do what He’s called you to do. Because you’re the only one who can do it exactly the way He wants it done. Sure someone else can do it, but they’ll never be able to do it exactly right. But YOU can. And it may not even be the exact way YOU want to do it, but it will turn out exactly the way God planned it. He knows the plans He has for you. And He’s GOD, do you really think that His plans can be messed up by a puny little human like you? Those plans were created FOR you, with your weaknesses, shortcomings, strengths and talents in mind. Don’t you think that the Creator of the Universe took all those things into account when He made those plans that included you? I mean, just look at His plan for Jesus! If that’s not proof that He planned ahead to cover your weaknesses then I don’t know what does! If you have accepted Jesus’ sacrifice on your behalf and have declared Him Lord over your life then you’ve got the eternally effective blood of Jesus covering you from head to toe and everything in between. My friend, if God has called you to something, then He WILL get you through it! He doesn’t call the equipped He equips the called. You know that just as well as I do. Now let’s go out there and start living like we believe it!

“Give thanks to the LORD and proclaim His greatness. Let the whole world know what He has done.” 1 Chronicles 16:8

1 Chronicles 12:1-15:29

“The whole assembly agreed to this, for the people could see it was the right thing to do.” 1 Chronicles 13:4

This morning I woke up, kissed my husband and said sleepily, “Happy Anniversary Baby.” Fourteen years ago today history was made. Two high school sweethearts got married and became an official team for life.

They didn’t have it easy;

they were young and naïve and got into plenty of trouble along the way. But they did it together. Throughout those fourteen years their family grew

and grew

and grew.

In the first seven years together they moved FOUR times. But these last seven years have all taken place in the same place, a place they call HOME. It’s a place where life has happened, over and over and over again. Mistakes have been made, plans have been ruined and feelings have been hurt. But it’s also a place where decisions have been made, priorities have been rearranged, laughter has been ABUNDANT and love has flown from every corner and every seam. Love grows here.

Almost five years ago to the date, their marriage was tested to its limit. They were both pretty fed up with each other and wanted to quit, but couldn’t. They’d made a promise to each other and to God and they weren’t about to break that promise. But they didn’t really want to keep living the way they had been either. And that’s when things really got shaken up. I won’t go over the whole story since they kinda wrote a whole book about it True Intimacy). But I will share a chapter of that book with you today, mostly because I think it relates to today’s verse of the day.

There is usually a “right thing to do” in every situation. But many times we can’t see that “right thing” because our vision has been clouded by pain, or regret, or unforgiveness, or bitterness. But no matter what the cloud is made of, God can clear it up and help you SEE with brilliant clarity what that “right thing to do” is and He will also help you to DO IT. You see, God’s good like that. He doesn’t leave us stranded and lost looking for a way home. He comes and picks us up and guides us all the way home.

He’s good like that.

1 Chronicles 7:30-11:47

“The people of Jebus taunted David saying, ‘You’ll never get in here!’ But David captured the fortress of Zion, which is now called the City of David.” 1 Chronicles 11:5

“David made the fortress his home, and that’s why they call it the City of David.” 1 Chronicles 11:7

“Together with all of Israel. They decided to make David their king, just as the LORD promised” 1 Chronicles 11:10

“David became more and more powerful, because the LORD of heaven’s armies was with him.” 1 Chronicles 11:9

So as you can see, I couldn’t pick just one verse this morning, mostly because these four tell the story. A story that starts with Paul from last week’s post, The Truth in the Confusion. I was re-reading that post last night and that verse from Acts contains a nugget that I wanted to write about that day, but just couldn’t quite get out.

“Since he couldn’t find out the truth in all the uproar and confusion, he ordered that Paul be taken to the fortress.” Acts 21:34

It’s the concept of the fortress, that place of safety in an attack; a refuge for the battle weary alongside the battle ready. It’s a beautiful picture of Jesus and His protection from Satan. But then we get to today’s first verse about David. The fortress he was facing wasn’t his own… yet. In Deuteronomy 7:1 God had promised, “When the Lord your God brings you into the land you are about to enter and occupy, he will clear away many nations ahead of you: the Hittites, Girgashites, Amorites, Canaanites, Perizzites, Hivites, and Jebusites. These seven nations are greater and more numerous than you.” And to that date the Jebusites hadn’t been taken care of yet. That’s where David comes in. He was the man for the job, the man God had chosen to finally conquer this enemy stronghold in His people’s life.

Jebus was a city on a hill surrounded by a sturdy wall. It would be the perfect spot for a king to build his capital – if he could conquer it. And as David stood outside the walls of the city, the people jeered at him because they felt safe in their fortress. Little did they understand that GOD was on David’s side, the God who provides wisdom where before there was none. David knew how impenetrable this fortress was. But he also knew that the people inside would need water and that there had to be a way for those people to get that water from inside the fortress. And David, utilizing the waterway into the city sent a select few inside to let him in. David conquered their unconquerable city of Jebus and the people who had mocked David only hours earlier, were on their knees begging for mercy from the mighty warrior by the end of the day.

“David made the fortress his home, and that’s why they call it the City of David.” 1 Chronicles 11:7 After conquering Jebus David renamed the city “Jerusalem” as it’s called to this very day. The people of Israel decided that David certainly was fit to be their king, and so years and years and years after Samuel had anointed him the future king of Israel, David stood before the people of Israel their chosen king. Just like God had promised him. God was with him in all that he did. David was a man after God’s own heart, which made him loveable to the people. But more than that as the head of leadership over Israel, he had the anointing and the favor of God with him too. Israel had the favor of God over them, because he was with them too.

1 Chronicles 4:24-7:29

“These are the men who served along with their sons:” 1 Chronicles 6:33

This morning’s sermon at church was on ripples. The pastor explained that when we’re willing to simply reach out and touch one life, just one, the ripples will continue because of that one outreach to that one person. Then he gave an example of how one guy was honest with his fishing buddy and told him that his life was really a mess and then invited him to church. The friend agreed and went and was saved. Then he invited one of his friends, who came and got saved. And then he invited one of his friends, who came and got saved. When the story was all told there was a row of thirteen (if I remember correctly) men who had been saved, all because ONE friend invited his friend to church.

One.

All too often Satan tries, and succeeds albeit briefly, to convince me that my writing isn’t effective. He tries to convince me that our ministry has had no lasting impact on the world at large. But today, Jesus reminded me that I AM effective, that our ministry HAS had a lasting impact on the world at large. And wouldn’t you know it, His example was, of all things, SHMILY Sunday. 😀 It all started with a busy morning’s hurried Bible study and a prayer asking God to show me His love for ME in a new and wonderous way. I never expected the result, an apple with pink swirls and a heart at its core.

I was so impacted by that ONE generous act of His love for ME that I just had to show everyone present the heart at the center of the apple in pink swirls. But then it didn’t end there, suddenly I was seeing smiling faces in the bubbles of soaking dishes that would pop before I could photograph them.

Hearts in trash on the floor as I was sweeping. It was all so random and yet so precisely for ME.

Often I would be the only one to see them before they would disappear completely, occasionally I would be able to get a picture of them to keep as a memento.

Then the day came when I posted this to the blog and told my friends all about my hearts and smiles. Suddenly THEY too were seeing hearts and smiles all over the place. One friend in particular would get at least one heart a day. She would often text them to me and our friends. It’s gotten to the point when someone else will see a heart they will text the picture to her and tell her they found a heart for her; not realizing that the heart was for THEM. L That’s about how far out I can see the ripples of my SHMILY story going, but I know that it’s gone much farther than that! And that’s just the SHMILY’s!

Satan is a LIAR friends. We’ve got to wrap our brains around that. We’ve got to come to grips with the fact that he is a LIAR and the Father of Liars! He will tell us ANYTHING to make us get down on ourselves and to keep us from our full potential. BUT Jesus is the TRUTH. He is the Father of the Truth! And He will tell us that Truth over and over and over again until we FINALLY trust Him enough to believe the Truth over the Lies we’ve always believed about ourselves. Thank YOU Jesus!

This week I’m not going to stick to just the hearts and the smiles, I want to share everything that I photographed this week that made me feel like Jesus loves ME. 😀

We in Sheridan are SO BLESSED to have such an AMAZING tennis program led by an amazing Christian. He brings out the best in these kids and I am so glad to have him speaking into our children’s lives. Plus it’s GREAT to have a reason to sit in the park for an hour or so every afternoon during the best weather imaginable! My very first little bloom on my peas from my very first garden! A smile in the ribs that Sean brought home from the BEST BBQ place around!!!! Big Hoffas BBQ! 😀

a heart in the ribs that my good friend Tammy brought us this week. Yup, we had ribs TWICE in one week!

Out for a walk on the Monon trail while Gabe is at tennis practice, I’m pretty sure that this is about the point when I got the text from Sean that practice was canceling due to the rain that was falling on the courts and hadn’t hit the ground on the trail yet because of all the tree cover. Hee hee. J A smiling spoon. In lunch with Sean. On the way home from lunch with Sean. My first fruits in my garden!!!!! Harvest time is soon!!! 😀 A flower from a friend. A dime, a nickel and an Allen wrench. SHMILY! An oily heart next to my car when I went to pick it up with TWO FRESH TIRES ON IT!!! 😀 Praise Jesus! I think this moment may be my favorite one of all, to actually SEE something I made on those precious tiny perfect little baby toes! I can’t even begin to describe how that felt! Fitting those little gospel sandals onto those feet was PRICELESS! Even if she was just the foot model for the in-utero baby that the sandals are really for, it was an awesome moment!

1 Chronicles 1:1-4:23

“All these were the descendants of Abraham through his concubine Keturah.” 1 Chronicles 1:33

OK, first of all, raise your hands, who knew that Abraham had a concubine that bore him SIX SONS? Hagar the handmaiden gave him one son, Ishmael. Sarah his wife gave him Isaac in his old age, but then after she died at the ripe old age of 127, Abraham married Keturah and he had six more sons. (Genesis 25)

In this week’s reading for our summer study of Beth Moore’s So Long, Insecurity You’ve Been a Bad Friend to Us,* we read Chapter 6: A Cocktail of Ego and Culture. Beth starts out by talking about how our foremothers had it easier when it came to a cultural standard of comparison for women. With no TV, internet, Twitter, Google or smart phones, the number of women you were able to compare yourself against was dramatically less than it is today. Yet, as God would have it my Word of the Day would just *happen* to be a long list of genealogies that included the concubines.

Can you imagine living in a culture where your soul purpose in life is to have sex with the man of the house? You don’t even have the honor, status or privilege of being his wife, just his mistress. That was your only value. Sad. Furthermore, can you imagine being the wife of the house in constant competition for your husband’s attention? Actually, that last one isn’t as far-fetched as you would think, sadly. We today have that exact same problem, only the women we compete with aren’t women in our household, they’re on the TV, and the internet and… on our husband’s phones. While we are forced to live in the confines of a flesh and blood body with its aging skin and graying hair, those airbrushed bits of hair colored, lyposuctioned perfection can appear on our husband’s phones at a moment’s notice to scratch whatever is itching them. It’s sickening and maddening all at the same time. Sarah had Hagar to compete with. Rachel had Leah. And Leah had Rachel. But we have THOUSANDS of them! In a culture where sex sells us “ordinary” women struggle with insecurity like the Hatfield’s struggled with the McCoy’s!

The other day I had a revelation. I am in that place I feared as a teenager. I vividly remember, sitting with my then boyfriend, now husband, asking him if he would still love me if I got fat. At that point I wasn’t even a hundred pounds soaking wet. And I KNEW it wouldn’t last. There was this one time I drove down to see him at college and when I met one of his friends he put his hands in a circle around my waist and said, “See I told you! My fingers are touching!” He was so proud of how small I was, and it scared me. I was afraid that he only loved me for my body, a body that would age and change and would NEVER be that small again – nor should it be.

There were many conversations where I would revisit and re-ask him the questions that plagued me the most.

“Would you still love me if I were fat?”

“Of course I would.”

“Really?”

“Yeah.”

“Would you still love me if my hair was all gray?”

“Absolutely”

“Mmmm… but would you still be attracted to me if I was fat?”

Silence….. and then a drawn out, unsure “sure” would escape his lips.

Deep in the gut of every skinny beautiful young girl is a fear of losing her attractiveness. Why? I’m not exactly sure, but I’m pretty sure it has to do with a) the intense emphasis our culture puts on outward beauty and b) because that beauty has the ability to attract a mate that will provide for our needs. Losing that beauty puts us at risk of losing the security of a provider of those needs. And all too often, that’s exactly what happens. As the inward beauty grows by leaps and bounds with age and wisdom, our societies definition of outward beauty fades with time and the husband who once loved us with an undying love, leaves us for someone younger and with fewer wrinkles. It’s a scenario that happens often enough that even the most secure woman struggles with the fear of losing the man she loves for someone prettier. But for those of us that struggle with insecurity, it’s the nightmare to end all nightmares; especially when the prettier woman is a smart phone and a bathroom away. We simply can’t compete with that!

Or can we?

Sure we can go to the gym more often or survive on salads for months on end, but is that competing, or just playing an unfair game and still coming in second? There’s got to be a way to win this war. There’s got to be a way to help our husbands choose us, rather than the porno model.

The only thing I can come up with is to PRAY! First of all to pray for ourselves and each other, that we would see OURSELVES as beautiful and desirable and able to satisfy our husband’s visual needs, no matter what size we are! One of the sexiest things on a woman is her confidence in herself! May we wear it with pride. (Having trouble seeing your beauty like I am at the moment, read this excerpt from our book True Intimacy, it should help.) Next, pray for him! Pray that God would help him keep his eyes pure, and that he wouldn’t be tempted by those younger women, or the porno women, or the TV women at all! Ask the Holy Spirit to help him win the battle against our sex driven society, and with God’s help I think we CAN compete with them AND WIN! After all, if God is for us then who can be against us? And I know for a fact that God is definitely for keeping husbands and wives together in monogamous marriages! So we’ve already got God on our side!

Lord, help us! Help us to see ourselves as the most beautiful women that You created. Help us to see our True beauty and not just our flaws. In fact, Lord, please help us to change our thinking about those things we think are flaws. Help us to come to grips with the fact that they’re not flaws at all, but rather assets to use for our benefit in the fight against the Enemy. Lord, help us to see ourselves the way You see us, beautiful and glorious within. Help us to see ourselves the way our husbands really DO see us, and not the way Satan wants us to THINK our husband’s see us. Help us to recognize when the Enemy is whispering lies into our ears and help us to tell him to BACK OFF in Jesus’ name. Help us to recognize when we’re spending too much time comparing our looks to others and to back away from the judgment chair when we’re judging ourselves too harshly. Please help us to rely less on our looks, no matter what age we are, and lean instead on our brains! We ARE smart women! Help us to remember that. We’ve chosen you and that’s the smartest choice any woman can make! Help us to work smarter not harder and to focus less on society’s definition of beauty and concentrate instead on Your definition. And Lord, I lift up all the men out there, married and unmarried alike. I ask that You would blind their eyes to the rubbish and open their eyes to the priceless gem they married, or will marry. Lord I pray that you would give them eyes for their wives ALONE. I pray that they would guard their eyes like the windows to the soul that they are. Lord I pray that you would lead them not into temptation, but that You would deliver them from evil! Help them to keep their feet, and everything else that goes with them, on the straight and narrow path. Lord, we lift our husbands to You, help them to desire ONLY us. Help us to be their dream woman and help us to see the dream guy in them. It’s there Lord, it’s always been there, but sometimes that dreaminess gets covered up with baby diapers, sleepless nights, and bills. Help us to push life out of the way and to see our life-partner in a re-newed light of Your glory. Help us to see them and remember the person we fell in love with. Help us to see that person that is still in there, though changed through the years like a seed grows into a tree. Help us to see the beauty of that MATURE tree and to love it more than we ever loved that sapling. 😀 You are awesome God, and I know that in all these things You will work Your glory and favor in our midst and make our mediocre marriages marvelous! And that is what we ask for Lord, for marvelous marriages that last a lifetime and leave a legacy of passionate love and intimacy behind for our children and our children’s children’s children for a thousand generations and beyond. In Jesus’ name, Amen!

* Moore, Beth. So Long, Insecurity You’ve Been a Bad Friend to Us. 2010. Tyndale House Publishers.