Who am I Living to Please?

Word of the Day: Acts 7:1-9:22

So, I had a whole other post half-heartedly written in my head and when I started writing it down and it just didn’t feel right.  I put down my pen, picked up my Bible and said through tears,  “LORD, what is Your message for ME today?”
I have spent so much time taking down and delivering messages for other people lately. And right now I’m the one hurting.  Much more than I expected I would.  My Grandpa just died yesterday and it’s hitting me with more force than I expected.  Every little thing seems to bring me to tears right now. And the people asking me, “how are you doing?” is annoying me. They may not intend it, but they all seem to be asking me if I’m staying strong and holding it all together.  Well, I guess the answer is, “no I’m not”. But really, should I be?  Should I be holding the sadness in so that it can swallow me whole later? Should I stay strong so that others aren’t made uncomfortable?
For so long I’ve lived my life for others, for their pleasure and satisfaction. Why? What good does that do me? And even though I’ve tried living for Christ (in the way others told me I should) that didn’t seem to ever work out either. So I wonder if perhaps I should start living for me instead. Start living to please His Holy Spirit inside me so that when I stand in heaven and look back on my life I can say I loved me. So that I can say I loved seeing Him in me coming out in ways I never expected or could have hoped.
This morning when I asked God what His message for ME was today He pointed to Acts 7:20 “Beautiful in God’s sight”.
Today, right now, when I’m trying so hard to write and be faithful and do His will.  Right now when I’m stinky and frumpy with my trusty Purdue sweatshirt from college, yoga pants,  crazy hair, no make up and even unbrushed teeth. Right now when I’m broken to bits and hurting and weeping constantly. That’s when I am truly beautiful in His sight. When I’m leaning on Him with everything I have because I recognize how weak I really am, how desperately I need His help because I simply can’t do this on my own. That is when I’m the most beautiful to Him.

image

(He made me take and post this picture)

Ok, I shared mine, what was your personal message from God through His Word today? If you’re brave enough, take a picture of your beautiful self and share it with us!

Categories: 365 Life, Acts, Writing Through the Bible in a Year | Tags: , , , | 2 Comments

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2 thoughts on “Who am I Living to Please?

  1. Jennifer Adams

    I am sorry you are hurting. I felt the same when my Grandpa Bilby passed.
    P.S. I took a selfie laying on my couch “listening” to the Pacer game, but can’t figure out how to post here. I will send to your email!
    LOVE YOU soooo much! xo

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