I don’t know about you, but this week has been hard on me! A lot of my struggle has been with my old nemesis, Perfection. You may be familiar with her too. She’s that voice in your ear that tells you your hair doesn’t look quite right, or “you shouldn’t have dressed like that to go to Wal-Mart. What were you thinking?” Perfection is the one who points out the teeny tiny stain on your shirt AFTER you’ve left the house only to then make you uber conscious of it the ENTIRE time you’re in that meeting with your boss. Perfection is the voice that tugs at your soul as your kids jump on the bus, “the other moms drive their kids to school.” She’s the one that points out the dust when you’re playing with the kids and points out the kids when you’re cleaning up the dust. Honestly, she’s a huge pain in the patoot!
And for this week her favorite topic of torment for me has been a speech I’ve been trying to write. If I’m not working on it she makes me feel like I should be. And if I am working on it she makes me feel like it’s not good enough.
Little Miss Perfect has got to go! She is no longer welcome on my shoulder. She is no longer allowed in my ear or in my head! I am who I am. I am NOT perfect and that is just fine. God didn’t create me to be perfect. He created me to be perfectly imperfect. That way, I would seek His perfection and help. This creates a blissful balance between God and me. I always need Him and He’s always here for me. He’s always the strength in my weakness. He’s always the sufficient grace to the thorn in my side. He’s the butter to my popcorn and the jelly to my peanut butter. His perfection is the perfect complement to my imperfection. So why do I constantly try to cover up my imperfections? By doing that I’m covering up Him! And just thinking that makes me sad. Why, oh why do I try so hard to be perfect? *exasperated sigh* Maybe someday I’ll defeat Perfection once and for all. But for now I’m pretty pleased with having defeated her for the moment.